Weezey Phone Home
June 30, 2009
Heard a short clip of this on Jamn this morning and new that I had to hook you all up with the full version. Turns out that they caught the guy and are charging him with false emergency, maybe if it was Duval Patrick calling the Massachusetts State Police for an escort it would have been different.
My Two Cents: New Sales Tax Sucks
June 29, 2009
Today Governor Duval Patrick signed a bill that will increase the state’s sales tax from 5% to 6.25% starting August 1. I’ll admit the gold dome of the Commonwealth has had some problems in the past, but never have I heard so much Beacon Hill BS due to a budget. Yes, unlike New Hampshire Massachusetts has actual cities that rely on a sales tax to survive, however anything over 5% is outrageous.
Does this mean that if I want to buy something at the Dollar Store I’m going to have to pay $1.06.25? I’m no bank teller, but last time I checked the mint didn’t produce a coin worth a quarter of a cent. They might as well raise the gas tax too just to screw everyone who’s going to be driving up to New Hampshire.
The perfect solution would have been to legalize horse racing, and send the now-defunct Boston mounted police ponies to the track; you would have killed two birds with on stone…or at least saved a trip to the glue factory.
-Nacho
Newton, MA…At Least It’s Not Somerville
June 29, 2009
Anybody’s who’s been reading the Newton Tab this past month has read about Alderman Lenny Gentile (ironic) getting Slumerville’s panties all up in a bunch over one of his speeches. It’s taken me a while to actually get around to watching the video of the speech and now that I have I’d like to explain to you why it may be the greatest speech delivered by any alderman anywhere.
- Gentile introduces his speech with one word, a proper noun, “Somerville.” Anytime a speech is titled “Somerville” you know that it’s going to have a lot of backhanded jabs at people, because that’s what Somerville does.
- I understand that Newton could be compared to Brookline and maybe Cambridge, but where or what is North Hampton? What does Gentile mean by “some things that where going on in North Hampton”? Why does he make it sound like there was a secret mob war going on in “North Hampton and communities like that”?
- Somerville should be more upset that they were compared to Chelsea and Everett and should be grateful anytime their name is uttered in the same sentence as Newton.
You can try to justify it any damn way you want but it’s BS, OK, it’s BS.
-Nacho
K-Rod Sucks
June 28, 2009
0-Clutch
I truly watched one of the most bizarre moments in baseball history when I saw K-Rod walk in a run with the bases loaded. The batter: Mariano Rivera. One of the greatest closers of all time came up to bat for the 3rd time in his life, fouled off a 93 MPH fastball, and then walked in his first RBI of his career.
K Rod is one of the best regular season closers in the game. He has the record for most saves in a season. But dude can’t pitch in the clutch. The Sox have repetitively pounded him into the ground in the postseason, and tonight was further proof that this guy doesn’t have a clutch bone in his body. When the heat is on, Francisco Rodriguez is about as useful as having one leg in an ass kicking contest.
-Topher
BILLY MAYS DEAD?
June 28, 2009
Man, Myth Legend- Billy Mays
According to CNN, Mays suffered injuries after a flight from Philadelphia to Tampa had a harder-than-usual landing in Tampa, allegedly injuring the pitchman, even though no one was reported injured on the flight’s landing.
What is happening to the world when even beloved pitchmen are falling to death’s cold, unwashed and Oxi-fied hands?
Damn you Death! WHY DIDNT YOU TAKE VINCE OFFER! WHY TAKE BILLY FROM US?!?!?!?
To put it in prospective this week, if Ed McMahon was the greatest sidekick ever, and Farrah was one of the most sexy icons of the 70′s, with Micheal Jackson was the King of Pop- Billy Mays was the Viceroy of Pitchmen. May he rest in peace.
Wow, this week is just sucking for cultural icons. I’m starting to think someone out there is killing off people for the hell of it and making it look like an accident.
I’m looking at you Kathy Griffin
Kathy Griffin: D-List celebrity or Cultural Assasin?
Originally Posted on Single/White/Geek
Baseball Trading Cards- A Simpler Time
June 27, 2009
So my mother, in all her infinite wisdom, was having a garage sale today at our home. Besides the hours of heavy lifting and listening to old people as they asked me to read off prices of various items a few intersting things happened. A creepy old guy hit on my sister, a old man told us , “he was looking for that one thing,” and some young kid asked me about trading cards.
“Trading cards? Yeah I got some”
Munson- You Guys Wanna Trade for a Posada? Cause I don't.
I looked at the kid, couldn’t be older than 10 I thought. I sprinted up to my room, grabbed by two binders full of baseball cards, ran back down to the garage and handed them to him. I was giddy, nay, pumped. How often do you see kids these days interested in trading cards?
NBA Draft Diary
June 26, 2009
He's Always Watching
I attended last night’s NBA draft and decided to steal a page out of Bill Simmons’ playbook. I didn’t know what to expect and now I can’t wait to go back next year. Here is a running diary of the events that occurred…
6:30-7: Just met up with two friends (J.D. and Donny) and head to Brother Jimmy’s for a few pre-game drinks. The friend who got me the ticket told me we may be going to an exclusive pregame party. Apparently we aren’t. Instead I find myself drinking 16 oz. PBRs and salivating over a BBQ pulled pork sandwich.
7:00: WaMu Theatre is very nice. Beer prices are outrageous but thank God I got a New York Knicks collector’s cup. Seats are perfect. Centered, aisle, first row of section. There seems to be assigned seats. There’s the degenerate Knicks and Nets fan seats. The “I just bought this jersey yesterday to get on TV” seats. We are in the corporate seats; I hope this doesn’t mean we can’t get rowdy.
7:02: Stuart Scott, Mark Jackson, Jeff Van Gundy, and Jay Bilas are here. I’m pissed Stephen A. Smith wasn’t asked to work. JVG would have set the record for most indescribable facial expressions.
More After The Jump
Retrospective Running (get it?) Diary
June 26, 2009
A look into the minds of .02% of yesterday’s runners:
CPG: God I should have worn mid-high Nike socks to look more lax and less track
PH: This isn’t depressing, I just made the turn out of the starting line and guys are on the other side of the street about to finish
CPG: What percentage of the proceeds went to renting all those porta-potties?
PH: These are some of the biggest asses I’ve ever seen
CPG: What pace is too fast to keep this side part in place?
PH: Hey lady, save your self the embarrassment and just stay home next year
CPG: Dear lady wearing corduroys in a 5k — I hate you
PH: Wonder if Charlie is running or riding his segway?
CPG: I bet Pat already vomited
PH: Jorts and Chuck Taylors while running? Yeah, you’re probably in high finance
CPG: If someone says “on the right” I’m going to punch them in the neck
PH: I wonder if anyone else is rocking out to Heart’s “Alone” on their iPod?
CPG: Leg tattoos. Didn’t you learn your lesson from tribal bands in the 90′s? Call me in a decade
PH: Well, it’s only a little demoralizing that the kid with one leg on crutches has a lead on me going into Kenmore square
CPG: God this is so racist. I can’t wait to drink
PH: Thank God I remembered my compression shorts
CPG: I feel awkward running without a lax stick in my hand
PH: I wonder if the guy spraying people with the hose is only spraying white people. You know, to not bring back the bad memories?
CPG: I wish Thomas Pink made a dry-fit tee
PH: I wonder if Charlie kept his bow tie on during the race
CPG: I’d like to thank all the unemployed hipsters who got off the couch and into their skinny jeans to hand out free Starbucks juices to runners
PH: I hope I remembered to DVR Grey’s
CPG: Nice Oakleys Lance
PH: If I lose to Suzie from accounting, I’m never going to live this down
CPG: I should have stretched. My legs are tight from wearing this 6 THOUSAND DOLLAR suit all day. COME ON
PH: Ok… I’ve gotta work on my “oh, its wasn’t that bad” face because I’m about to meet up with my coworkers
CPG: This was surprisingly not bad. I’m definitely going to fool myself into signing up for more and then say fuck it the day of.
-Pat and Charles
Nickelback Lyric Of The Day (NLOTD)
June 26, 2009
“Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)”
- Rockstar
Lets hope Nickelback doesnt die and every radio station decides to loop their music for 24 hours. Actually…
-Casey
Races and Race
June 26, 2009
R.I.P. Michael Jackson
I wanted to wake up today and type away at my Blackberry about the JP Morgan 5K. However, since the death of MJ is on everyone’s mind right now, allow me to digress and ruminate about the King of Pop, R.I.P.
When now President Obama was running for the oval office last year, I remember numerous media members contending that if the American public elected a black president we would have subsequently entered a post-race world. I don’t buy that for a second. I wish it were true but it’s not. When a black kid is walking down the street with a watermelon and nobody thinks about making a joke – that is when we have entered a post-race America.
However, I think MJ has done more for this social phenomeonal/endeavor than anyone else. Perfect example was last night at the starting line of the 5K I ran. News/rumors about his death began to circulate amidst the crowd of over 10,000 and from where I was standing, there was a vast range of emotions evoked by this. People were sad, sarcastic and confused but mostly sad. The point is a bunch of white people who chose to run for their respective corporations, who were donating to put inner city kids through summer school, were publicly upset about a man who began his career as an African-American and unfortunatley, died trying to redeem it as a Caucasian. And everyone fucking loves Michael Jackson’s music, even if, like us all, he is completely and utterly fallible. I think this is as close to a post-race world we have seen. Sorry for not taking the low-road and make some sarcastic comments about this. It was too easy and unnecessary. Now put the volume up on “Billy Jean” and give the man a little respect in passing. Peace.
